Healing after Infidelity: How Can You Recover from Extramarital Affair

Have you just found out that your spouse has cheated?

This must be a painful, painful time for you. You feel angry, confused… lost. To you, there are no words to describe this life-shattering news that the person you love and trust had an affair with somebody else.

If you are in this difficult situation, here’s an encouraging message for you today: you can heal.

There is hope for your marriage despite all these things that just happened. It may seem like a far off, distant thing, but it is possible to heal after an affair as you and your spouse take the first steps toward change.

Here are some ways to help you recover from infidelity and rebuild your marriage, from CBN Asia’s Holy Week Special, Tanikala: Paghilom:

1. Pray and seek God’s help

Toni Miranda, played by actress Lara Quigaman-Alcaraz, found herself cheating on her husband John, portrayed by actor Marco Alcaraz. After realizing the weight of her sins, Toni fell on her knees and sought God’s forgiveness. She and her husband asked God to help restore their marriage and heal their broken hearts.

Thankfully, God is in the business of restoring broken things—especially marriages (1 Peter 5:10). Seek His guidance because His desire and design for your marriage is to be strong and healthy.

Pray that He gives you the strength, comfort, and wisdom you need to rebuild a relationship that stands the test of time. Trust that He can do miracles in your marriage and in this situation.

2. Choose forgiveness

It’s hard to forgive after all the texts you’ve read, the pictures you discovered, the conversations you overheard, or the numbing situation you walked into.

John knows exactly how you feel. In Paghilom, John’s world turned upside down after learning about his wife’s multiple affairs. Instead of lingering on the offense or punishing Toni, John chose to fix his eyes on Jesus. He chose to love and forgive his wife.

The pain of betrayal stings like no other, but forgiveness is like the healing balm that liberates you from the wounds of the past. You might struggle to forgive at first, but it becomes easier as you realize that when you needed forgiveness for your sins, God has freely forgiven you.

“Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins.” (Proverbs 10:12 NKJV)

3. Go to marriage counseling

Throughout their healing journey, Toni and John sought God. They also sought the help of trusted friends, marriage counselors, and signed up for a healing recovery program which helped them address their issues as a couple and as individuals.

Like them, you might want to consider consulting with a trained marriage counselor or family counselors at church. You don’t have to carry the pain alone—seek help. Both of you can make the decision to get some outside help and prayers.

Invest time for your marriage and be intentional in rebuilding your relationship with your spouse. As devastating as an affair is, God does some amazing things when a couple commits to rebuilding their marriage.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.” (Proverbs 3:5-8 ESV)

Do you need God’s healing and restoration in your marriage?

We are here to pray for you. Call the CBN Asia Prayer Center at 8-737-0-700 or send your prayer requests to our Facebook page.

If you are blessed by this year’s Tanikala and you want to bless the ministry, you may do so through this link.

CBN Asia’s Tanikala Brings You Inspiring Stories of Hope and Healing with “Tugon sa Dalangin” and “Paghilom”

CBN Asia brings you inspiring stories of hope and healing in its much-anticipated Holy Week Special—Tanikala: Tugon sa Dalangin which airs on Maundy Thursday, April 14, and Tanikala: Paghilom on Good Friday, April 15, at 10:30 am on GMA.

In Tugon sa Dalangin, disaster survivors and families affected by the pandemic recount moments of helplessness and how God answered their prayers through Operation Blessing Foundation Philippines, CBN Asia’s humanitarian arm.

This Operation Blessing Special is hosted by The 700 Club Asia hosts Erick Totañes and Sonjia Calit. Erick narrated, “When we bless others, we are blessed in return. If we join our hands together to be the ‘answered prayers’ of our kababayans, God’s good plan for our nation will come to pass.”

Sonjia added, “It’s a cycle of blessing that grows bigger and wider—until finally it reaches to the ends of our nation.” Tugon sa Dalangin is directed by Timmy Yee.

For Good Friday, top-caliber actors and real-life couple Marco and Lara Quigaman-Alcaraz are back in another heart-tugging, true-to-life story of a marriage tarnished by infidelity, in Paghilom.

Lara plays the role of Toni Miranda, an ambitious wife who fell into a cycle of adultery. Toni’s husband John—portrayed by Marco—bears the brunt of his wife’s affair and was ultimately torn between revenge and forgiveness.

Paghilom is directed by John Valdes Tan and Seth Blanco.

Witness stories of hope and healing in Tanikala: Tugon sa Dalangin on Maundy Thursday, April 14, and Tanikala: Paghilom on Good Friday, April 15, at 10:30 am on GMA.

Join our online conversations and use the hashtags #Tanikala, #TugonSaDalangin, and #Paghilom.

For more inspiring stories, subscribe to the CBN Asia’s YouTube channel and spend a meaningful Holy Week by watching Tanikala Rewind—a YouTube marathon of previous Tanikala offerings.

5 Tips to Cultivate Forgiveness in Your Marriage

Agree or disagree: Forgiveness is one of, if not the most important aspect of marriage.

You might say it is love, but come to think of it—isn’t forgiveness a huge part of it? There is no love without forgiveness, and you can only sustain a marriage if you know how to truly forgive.

Here’s the good thing about forgiveness: It is possible! You can always choose to cultivate forgiveness in your marriage and your home.

Let forgiveness reign within your marriage with these 5 helpful tips:

1. Be quick to forgive

One of the most common misconceptions about forgiveness is that it is a “one-time, bigtime” thing. Truth is, forgiveness is a day-by-day process of extending grace into your marriage.

Colossians 3 holds the same message: forgive quickly and completely. Be honest about how the hurt has affected you, but don’t stay in that pit for too long lest it breed anger and bitterness. Choose not to linger on the offense. Forgive quickly. Forgive frequently.

“Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.” Colossians 3:12-14 MSG)

2. Keep no record of wrongs

When your spouse wronged you, it’s so easy to fall into the habit of finding faults in everything that they do. Knowing this reality, the Bible has a gentle reminder: Love keeps no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5).

Do you want to cultivate forgiveness in your marriage?

Avoid keeping mental notes of what’s been done to you. Stop looking for occasions to be offended and avoid continuously punishing your spouse for the offenses they have made in the past. Let go and let God do the work in their hearts.

3. Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouth

Things might not have worked out the way you wanted; you’ve been hurt the way you hadn’t expected. All that pain, disappointment, and anger could easily contaminate your communication with your spouse.

Allowing hateful talk with your spouse is like rubbing salt into an open wound. It aggravates the situation, yet it brings no good. Instead of reminding your spouse of their failures and frailties, sow gentle words of love and encouragement to build them up. Choose your words wisely.

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29 ESV)

4. Confess, apologize, and pray

You and your spouse will both make mistakes, that’s a given. But if you look at successful marriages, you will see a common denominator: they are good forgivers.

Therefore, a lasting marriage is a union of two very forgiving people—a husband and wife who both have this habit of confessing their wrongs, apologizing, and asking for forgiveness.

Why not start with yourself? Show your spouse that you forgive them, then pray for them. Show how much you value forgiveness, so you can encourage them to make room for forgiveness as well. It might be hard at first especially when the offense is too deep, so it’s good to remember that you can always ask God to help you forgive.

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” (James 5:16 ESV)

5. Realize that you needed forgiveness too

Before you can extend forgiveness to others, it’s important to realize that you needed forgiveness, too—and it was freely given to you.

All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). This means that you, too, make mistakes. Thankfully, God isn’t only just—He is continuously forgiving! He showed His forgiveness, mercy, and love for you by dying on the cross and giving you an eternal life.

So whenever you’re torn between exercising justice and forgiving your spouse, choose forgiveness. Forgiveness is powerful and healing, so give it to your spouse in the same way you have received it from God.

This Holy Week, witness the power of forgiveness in restoring a marriage marred by betrayal. Watch Tanikala: Paghilom, starring real-life couple Marco and Lara Quigaman-Alcaraz, airing on April 15, at 10:30 AM on GMA.

Devotionals

img

What It Takes To Believe in God

His love for you is endless. That’s the kind that never fades. He reminds us all of his love for us in Jeremiah 31:3you with unfailing kindness.

img

The Fearless Life | God’s Word Today

His love for you is endless. That’s the kind that never fades. He reminds us all of his love for us in Jeremiah 31:3

img

What It Takes To Believe in God

His love for you is endless. That’s the kind that never fades. He reminds us all of his love for us in Jeremiah 31:3you with unfailing kindness.

img

The Fearless Life | God’s Word Today

His love for you is endless. That’s the kind that never fades. He reminds us all of his love for us in Jeremiah 31:3