"Madalas,
nakatulala lang siya...walang kibo," (He was often
quiet, just staring into space) actress Amy Austria recalls
of fellow actor and nine years live-in partner Jay Ilagan
two days before he died in a motorcycle accident last
February 10, 1994. When she demanded to know what his
problem was, he said: "Parang kinakabahan lang ako,
hindi ko alam (kung bakit). (I feel fearful, but I don't
know the reason why)." Amy told him that maybe it
was because he no longer was praying every night as he
used to do. But he protested that just the previous night
he had watched The 700 Club program and prayed with the
host. "Sabi (ni Jay): 'Sabi kasi ni Pat Robertson,
maki-pray ako sa kanya." (Jay told me that Pat Robertson
invited the audience to pray with him). Amy learned that
it was a prayer of surrender to and trust in Jesus Christ.
"Yung accepting Jesus Christ for your salvation,
ganyan, di ko naman naintindihan at the time."
(I didn't understand what that prayer meant at the time).
That
prayer may have made Jay ready for his step into the
next life, but it would take several more years before
Amy too would pray for salvation and surface from the
deep gloom of widowhood . "Kung wala si Alexandra
(their adopted daughter) noon, nagpakamatay ako"
(If Alexandra were not there, I would have killed myself),"
she remembers. "Para akong baby, di makalakad,
di makatayo, walang paa na. Kung may paa man, wala namang
silbi." (I felt like a baby that couldn't walk
or stand. I felt like I didn't have any legs. Even though
I had them, they were useless), Amy describes her emotional,
psychological paralysis then. Drugs didn't help her
out of it, neither did disco and bar-hopping, or affairs.
Until
she attended Bible studies and prayed to accept Jesus
in her heart. "For the first time, I felt complete,
kahit walang love, walang lover," she marvels.
Today Amy is happily married to businessman Romulado
"Duke" Ventura who she describes as "very,very
loving, mabait. "Before pag sinasabi yung "Seek
first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and everything
shall be added unto you, di ko naiintindihan yun. Sabi
ko, nagsee-seek naman ako, nagsisimba, nagpapray naman.
Di lang pala ganon. Kailangan kilalanin mo talaga..pag-aralan
mo Siya. (I didn't understand what the verse meant.
After all I thought I sought God, I prayed. But that
wasn't all I had to do. I learned I had to really know
Jesus, study Him.) (Now) I have my career..love.. happiness..family..contentment,..peace..
I have everything because I have Jesus Christ."
Amy's
"true confessions" of her life as a poor Tondo
girl, her rise as an actress, the trauma of watching
Jay die, her miraculous deliverance from drugs and depression,
and the circumstances that led to her marrying her dream
man were the special feature of The 700 Club Asia hosted
by Peter Kairuz and Dulce. The show airs every Wednesday
at 12:30 AM after "Pipol" on Channel 2. Replays
are on Sundays, 8:00 AM on Studio 23.
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